Bloody farewell full of smaries and caramel taste

Spisovateľ/ka: Tamara | Vložené dňa: 20. januára 2009

Bloody farewell full of smarties and caramel taste (It is like you Adam, you always makes me bleed)


They are lying in the bed, dark room, just curtain is blowing and there is a soft ray of sun. He is sleeping and she is sitting. She is smoking cigarette with shaking hand and she imagined that she is biting him to wake him up.  And suddenly she saw a little spider in the wall above her head. Then she just smiled and sat in the window, her legs are swaying and then she jumped out of the window. As she is falling in her mind are a lot of memories that look like a quick film without sound and then she screamed. He opened eyes, heard everything, he smile and closed eyes.

Lily: „Look at these people! Where are they going? "

Adam: „Somewhere, where don't want to go..."

Lily: „Like us? "

Adam:„Yeah exactly like us but a bit further or closer."

Lily: We were sitting on the bench in the park. Finally we had some time for each other to talk about serious things, to eat something but instead of it we were killing time- beautifully.


Lily (voice in back) and we can see them in the park near the tree: I felt it couldn't be more perfect even though I didn't believe it. Sometimes I didn't believe that he is real until he didn't look at me. He managed to wake me up so wildly and beautifully. Sometimes it was hurting or annoying.

Lily: „Tell me about her? "

Adam: „About who? "

Lily: „Well, about your mom. "

Adam: „It's not easy"

Lily„I know. Nothing is easy. Sometimes I am thinking about her when you are not with me. I am imaging how it was with her. If you are similar, or not? "

Adam: „Maybe too much. "

Adam: „ She was always flying and tumbling on the clouds. She wanted to leave me all of these cramps memories and cigarette pancakes. We were dreaming in the darkness and reading bruise sky, which was changing in sunflowers, which we were putting into the box of bear. Sweet breeze of her breath and her septic eyes. I made a plane from a paper and I wrote there: I love you. Then I launched it from the roof of our block of flats. I didn't have time to tell her. I knew that she is dying but I didn't say anything. I was just observing how the rainbow is disappearing out of her. Did you see vanishing colours? It is unbearable.

Lily: Why did you write it on the plane?

Adam: You know when I was younger she told me once, that if she dies, she will transform to the black cloud far away from God. She said it will be immense because then she never fall again. She was herself one big fall. "


Lily (voice in background) and we can see how they are lying on the bed and she is doing the same things that she is describing.

Lily: We were lying on a bed. He was so brittle and broken. Sometimes I stuck my finger into his mouth and tried to fill his space. Cuddling, dreaming skinny boy. Most the time I nestle close to him. I wanted to see his dreams. I wanted to be their part and then I wanted to be him and just merge in. He never talked about his nightmares because he respected them. Maybe he just thought that he can burn them, torn them apart and bury them just like me but I wasn't so easy. He slashed my fists, drank my blood, ate my flesh and I just forgave him.

We were chasing bats and shooing angels. I don't know what kind of relationship we had but it was so riveting and strong that sometimes I couldn't breathe. I felt like we are the same person so it was difficult to live for two.


She is standing on the stage full of jumping people, everything is so crowded. She is watching playing band everybody is trembling and she seems to be sad in different world. In front of band is standing photograph. He looks like he is bored or thoughtful then he turn around and saw her, so beautiful, different and sophisticated. She went out to smoke and he as well. Its cold outside, she is shaking with her cigarette. He had his camera with him full of her photos from the concert, which he took when she was in different world.

Paul: Hi

Lily: Hi. I saw your photos in London in that small gallery. I was just walking down the street and then I saw these pictures. They are immense. You had to travel a lot.

Paul: Yeah I did just a little escape.

Lily: For 4 years?

Paul: Sometimes when you are running, it's so nice and you can't stop.

Lily: It's the same when you are stuck; sometimes it's more comfortable than to run.

Both are smiling and smoking

Paul: I am, Paul

Lily: I am Lily. So why are you here? I mean why did you come back?

Paul: Later it was dark there and I just needed the light.

They are walking along some park and it started to snow. Their steps are printed in the ground.

Lily: When I was young the only thing I wanted was to be very very big, reach the sky and became a star. Just shine and nothing else.

Paul: I think you already became star, shining in the dark.

Lily: Come on. You just want to sleep with me.

Laughing they went to his place and had a sex.


Lily: What's the next word after crying?

Adam: Bleeding. Tell me about him and don't change the topic!

Lily: What you want to know? If he is good at bed or what?

Adam: Yeah! You can start with this.

Lily: Oh shut up! I am not going to tell you about my sexual life! But he is....wauuu

Adam: Oh you make me jealous!

Lily: Because of me or him?

They are giggling and smoking cannabis.

Lily: Anyway it will be disaster, I think that I always knew that something is wrong here, upside down or whatever.

Adam: Or maybe you have been just smoking too much.

Lily: Or too less, give it to me you selfish. Oh, Adam I really don't know what I would do without you.

Adam: Oh my Got, there it goes, romantic and heartbreaking moment.

Lily: Can you just shut up for a sec? I just wanted to say that you are moth and I am the butterfly and we are inseparable.

Adam: But you know, that they don't live together. I mean light and dark

Lily: Yeah exactly, but they can't survive without each other.

He started to kiss her.


They are lying on the bed full of his photos.

Lily: So, what if you leave soon to find a light, maybe I won't be firefly forever.

Paul: I can't imagine you without light.

Lily: You know sometimes it happens. Even the light needs darkness.

Paul: Just...don't think about future. It's too far away. Believe and live for a presence.


She just can't wake up and I don't know what o do. I fucking don't know what to do.

Just wake her up!

Shut the fuck up! You really think that I didn't try it?

Why are you so furious? Just listen yourself. It's ridiculous how its possible that she cant wake up? It's like. Its bullshit....

Because she doesn't want. She lost her faith.

Adam, calm down! She will be all right. She is always like that calling in the middle of the night and wants something. She is like a child

You don't know her. You know I really ask myself why I am with you.

Adam: My little ladybird please wakes up and fucks everything! She is staring into his eyes and she has so glues eyes but he can see that she's fighting behind them. He is cuddling to her and praying for something to someone he doesn't know.

In the middle of the night he suddenly woke up and found her in the balcony, smoking and staring to the stars. She was shining like never before. He came to her and hugs her so tightly and desperately full of relief.

Adam: You can't imagine how scared I was.

Lily: I can because you woke me up.

Adam: Why?

Lily: I think there wasn't any reason. I felt so weak and tired and kind of broken. You know I split up with Paul, which wasn't surprising but... you weren't there and I started to panic and think and you know that its dangerous , when I think too much and these thoughts...

Adam: What thoughts?

Lily: About life.... I can't stand it anymore. I just don't know, what to do, where to go. I don't belong here. I am completely lost in here more than its normal.

Adam: Ladybird... it's the same about me and you know it! I feel like that all the time but...

Lily: But you can survive, Adam! Fuck, you know you can because you are moth. And here it's still dark so you can live. And I am fucking afraid of loosing you or that it won't be like now forever. Because seriously, what lasts forever?

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veronika rauschova
6 bodov - odporúčam
Look at these people! Where are they going? " „Somewhere, where don't want to go..." I don't belong here. I am completely lost in here more than its normal.  
Spisovateľ/Autorveronika rauschova Pridané dňa10. marca 2009 13:19:32
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